Lately I've realized that my life might crumble before me and my reputation is going to completely fall apart. I go by 3 different names now in four different parts of my life. Lixy, Melixa, Edie, Misty, all of which I am called on a regular basis. Constantly confused with what to do.
School, being one issue I have yet to accomplish, I'm itching to learn more and to give my money away to countless people who will pick up what I am willing to put down. Maybe I'm just drunk right now. But I quit smoking, so theres a start.
Anyway, I dont know what I'm talking about. I got a kitty named Frankenstine, a new set of roller skates and a 30 gig ipod for 60 dollars. Go me.
this post is random as fuck. more to come.
Sunday, May 3, 2009
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Friday, February 13, 2009
Monday, February 2, 2009
Long nights, what day?
I'm in the process of figuring out a permanent schedule, because the one I have now SUCKS.
it basically looks like this
Monday- 12-7am at the cat then 10am-5pm at pizza casbah
Tuesday-12-7am at the cat
Wednesday-10am-5pm at casbah
Thursday- OFF
Friday- 6pm to 12am at the cat
Saturday-Off
Sunday-Off
So basically, my work sched has got me pulling 17 hour days (because I cant nap in between jobs or I won't wake up) and this shit is SHIT.
blaughhhhhhggg
it basically looks like this
Monday- 12-7am at the cat then 10am-5pm at pizza casbah
Tuesday-12-7am at the cat
Wednesday-10am-5pm at casbah
Thursday- OFF
Friday- 6pm to 12am at the cat
Saturday-Off
Sunday-Off
So basically, my work sched has got me pulling 17 hour days (because I cant nap in between jobs or I won't wake up) and this shit is SHIT.
blaughhhhhhggg
Monday, January 26, 2009
Time to get fat
Your Input
Height: 5'10"
Weight: 124 pounds
Resultyour BMI index is 17.8,
indicating your weight is in the underweight category for adults of your height.
Dang. Time to get fat.
Height: 5'10"
Weight: 124 pounds
Resultyour BMI index is 17.8,
indicating your weight is in the underweight category for adults of your height.
Dang. Time to get fat.
saved.
I am a stupid journal keeper and made the mistake of taking it to recite some bullshit while it was snowing and I ruined some pages. Now I have to write them down here to keep the memory of them before I throw it away.
1)
"Understanding"
As I arrived, I closed my eyes..just like you recalled,
two arms stretched out, and I wait for the surprise.
But the dialect is foreign and even though we speak in tongues
I cannot break the barrier or breach the reprise
I am stuck with no luck, no dice, no cigar,
Minutes turn to years eventually,
Hours pass us by and I am craving just your company,
Because you are still in my dreams
and when I awake in life, I ascend,
my mended heart will kick start into loving you my friend.
Who broke into song? and who all sang along?
I wish I could capture the true moments of being young
But a snapshot will not depict of who I'm growing up to be
and the purity and wisdom of the people who've helped shape me.
I look at trees, nature..the waters in the river
the cigarette smoke dances in elaborate pictures
while wind chimes sound off in the back of my mind,
I've come to a better place and right now
I'm feeling
fine.
2)
(disclaimer- if you're actually reading this..it sucks, it sucked to write, and its more of a rant then anything)
"Sorry, I have to take this"
You made a place where she now sits, crying out in frustration,
"Why can't we save this?"
Made a promise that was broken
now im chocking back my angry words
thunderstorms brewing through my mind and chewing through my soul
I will remain consoled, keep opinions to myself
I will not rewrite our history
instead I'll put it on a shelf.
Collect dust.
Self help wont prevail over shadows cast upon the truth
when all your lies add up. Its sad,
but its a must,
That I cant even fucking leave you.
Through and through while you continue
to weave a web of something that you think is true
and for a split second, I believed you. I was alright
feeling as if my plight of righteousness had taken flight
but when you get one side that outweighs the other
im plundering through my stomach
vomit words of pen and paper arms
I'll wrap myself around the font
Write to the point at which I no longer have a point
I get the shakes out of frustration.
I hate your policies,
follow me through the patch of jaded fallacies,
Falsify the times we spent and thrived,
I survived off the things that you said,
But I mean..fuck. this isnt the first time I've written to vent
A problem to solve itself and on top of all of this,
im wilted. In the sun im filtering rays of the days when
confused mindsets sat behind us,
I rode the city bus for an hour just to see you!
I can no longer compete.
I'm sorry that the hate shines through,
but I'm sick of my and you.
You and I.
Broken english is the bond between us
and I'm crying in your back seat.
3)
this is where dogs go to die. under the front porch where we sat and talked all night.
You would judge me, so I would lie about my life,
but when we parted ways, I think (or thought) that maybe we both forgot.
Now we sit side by side, to different worlds.
You're so far away from me.
4)
Cinnamon and sugar coated dreams,
Bitter and dark wake sugary sweet new meanings.
Is this a new chapter? a new beginning?
and is it the end finally?
If I must trust a stranger until this dust clears then I will.
But if I bring a friend will they extend a helping hand?
Or better yet, even a subtle plan to help protect the woman I am?
Or will they over draw a mental note from a conceded man who I choose if or
if not I choose to sink or swim. This makes no sense.
Bury my body.
5)
The deceit starts in my feet as I walk down the street and my steps reflect the throbbing base that's pounding through my body.
My heart beats with remorse and that look that she just gave you courses fire through my veins.
I am not the least bit insane, or as much of a sociopath as presented
but feel as if the time has come when my soul is finally feeling mended.
I'm bending over backwards and im stalking through the back woods
cracking branches over my limbs out of frustration, strength and angst,
I will contort myself into a hiding place.
I am a little mouse and I'm dying behind the furnace
in this dusty drab apartment this could be my last resort
by spying through the looking glass and watching ants across the floor.
I am so sore.
A bruised pelvis, the booze tells us
that we drool instead of snore,
Slow and sultry,
hopes and hosiery,
hoes that wash the toes of Jesus's feet
they are crushing me.
I hosts that slow the show down and the songs are over sober frowns.
6)
Feelings of serene dreams exploding on the scenes
as picture planed landscapes are swirling in your creamy complexion,
Heed the message and bring a death to the progress or time and reflection.
I'm perplexed and only write to put a stress on my vocabulary
rhyming new shit say to say I'm birthing preconceived like Virgin Mary's.
My hear-say is scary, but I still believe in other people needing to weave through their dreams
that keep plowing through the evil.
Scream and shout, I am a mouse.
Aroused I cannot find you feeling blinded and jaded, I am sound proof.
Constrict the noise, and conflicting ploys..
I'm only trying to crawl through, the mall booths that photograph the essence of you
I invite the few to unleash the dew stuck on the morning grasses
on my bike im riding after you FASTER!
You cannot deny the trash man, he works the worst job available and goes as fast as he can.
He trys to find another plan as he flies through the fruit stand
to find the ripest melon.
Can you turn off that light that's next to your night stand?
I got a million answers to the questions in your quicksand mind,
your ironclad timing keeps the cadence fragrent
throughout the course of time,
but when reguarding the sky at night, and I wrong or right?
Time to pick or choose, win or lose?
make no sense at all and NEVER act like that is bruising me.
SAVED.
1)
"Understanding"
As I arrived, I closed my eyes..just like you recalled,
two arms stretched out, and I wait for the surprise.
But the dialect is foreign and even though we speak in tongues
I cannot break the barrier or breach the reprise
I am stuck with no luck, no dice, no cigar,
Minutes turn to years eventually,
Hours pass us by and I am craving just your company,
Because you are still in my dreams
and when I awake in life, I ascend,
my mended heart will kick start into loving you my friend.
Who broke into song? and who all sang along?
I wish I could capture the true moments of being young
But a snapshot will not depict of who I'm growing up to be
and the purity and wisdom of the people who've helped shape me.
I look at trees, nature..the waters in the river
the cigarette smoke dances in elaborate pictures
while wind chimes sound off in the back of my mind,
I've come to a better place and right now
I'm feeling
fine.
2)
(disclaimer- if you're actually reading this..it sucks, it sucked to write, and its more of a rant then anything)
"Sorry, I have to take this"
You made a place where she now sits, crying out in frustration,
"Why can't we save this?"
Made a promise that was broken
now im chocking back my angry words
thunderstorms brewing through my mind and chewing through my soul
I will remain consoled, keep opinions to myself
I will not rewrite our history
instead I'll put it on a shelf.
Collect dust.
Self help wont prevail over shadows cast upon the truth
when all your lies add up. Its sad,
but its a must,
That I cant even fucking leave you.
Through and through while you continue
to weave a web of something that you think is true
and for a split second, I believed you. I was alright
feeling as if my plight of righteousness had taken flight
but when you get one side that outweighs the other
im plundering through my stomach
vomit words of pen and paper arms
I'll wrap myself around the font
Write to the point at which I no longer have a point
I get the shakes out of frustration.
I hate your policies,
follow me through the patch of jaded fallacies,
Falsify the times we spent and thrived,
I survived off the things that you said,
But I mean..fuck. this isnt the first time I've written to vent
A problem to solve itself and on top of all of this,
im wilted. In the sun im filtering rays of the days when
confused mindsets sat behind us,
I rode the city bus for an hour just to see you!
I can no longer compete.
I'm sorry that the hate shines through,
but I'm sick of my and you.
You and I.
Broken english is the bond between us
and I'm crying in your back seat.
3)
this is where dogs go to die. under the front porch where we sat and talked all night.
You would judge me, so I would lie about my life,
but when we parted ways, I think (or thought) that maybe we both forgot.
Now we sit side by side, to different worlds.
You're so far away from me.
4)
Cinnamon and sugar coated dreams,
Bitter and dark wake sugary sweet new meanings.
Is this a new chapter? a new beginning?
and is it the end finally?
If I must trust a stranger until this dust clears then I will.
But if I bring a friend will they extend a helping hand?
Or better yet, even a subtle plan to help protect the woman I am?
Or will they over draw a mental note from a conceded man who I choose if or
if not I choose to sink or swim. This makes no sense.
Bury my body.
5)
The deceit starts in my feet as I walk down the street and my steps reflect the throbbing base that's pounding through my body.
My heart beats with remorse and that look that she just gave you courses fire through my veins.
I am not the least bit insane, or as much of a sociopath as presented
but feel as if the time has come when my soul is finally feeling mended.
I'm bending over backwards and im stalking through the back woods
cracking branches over my limbs out of frustration, strength and angst,
I will contort myself into a hiding place.
I am a little mouse and I'm dying behind the furnace
in this dusty drab apartment this could be my last resort
by spying through the looking glass and watching ants across the floor.
I am so sore.
A bruised pelvis, the booze tells us
that we drool instead of snore,
Slow and sultry,
hopes and hosiery,
hoes that wash the toes of Jesus's feet
they are crushing me.
I hosts that slow the show down and the songs are over sober frowns.
6)
Feelings of serene dreams exploding on the scenes
as picture planed landscapes are swirling in your creamy complexion,
Heed the message and bring a death to the progress or time and reflection.
I'm perplexed and only write to put a stress on my vocabulary
rhyming new shit say to say I'm birthing preconceived like Virgin Mary's.
My hear-say is scary, but I still believe in other people needing to weave through their dreams
that keep plowing through the evil.
Scream and shout, I am a mouse.
Aroused I cannot find you feeling blinded and jaded, I am sound proof.
Constrict the noise, and conflicting ploys..
I'm only trying to crawl through, the mall booths that photograph the essence of you
I invite the few to unleash the dew stuck on the morning grasses
on my bike im riding after you FASTER!
You cannot deny the trash man, he works the worst job available and goes as fast as he can.
He trys to find another plan as he flies through the fruit stand
to find the ripest melon.
Can you turn off that light that's next to your night stand?
I got a million answers to the questions in your quicksand mind,
your ironclad timing keeps the cadence fragrent
throughout the course of time,
but when reguarding the sky at night, and I wrong or right?
Time to pick or choose, win or lose?
make no sense at all and NEVER act like that is bruising me.
SAVED.
Monday, January 19, 2009
I haven't posted in a bit because my life has been completely crazy. I moved into my new house with my 4 amazing room mates whom I lurv and whatnot and there hasn't been any internet until today! (I mean, I can always use the internet at work at 3am like I'm doing right now..but I'm a busy lady).
Anyway, lately my life has consisted of the following
1. Lots of sleep
2. Lots of work
3. Lots of drinking
4. Lots of Denver
5. Lots of missing someone who I miss.....
6. Its Always Sunny
:)
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